Making it work

"Mom! Dad! Bart's dead!"

"Oh, no! Bart!"

pause

"That's right. I'm dead--dead serious--about going to Itchy and Scratchy Land."

Today was a productive day and a reflection of the implosion of the old Kitimat General Hospital (a.k.a. da 'Pink Elephant).' Yes, it was a mostly pink-coloured building that sat on a prime piece of land perched abolve the downtown area.

It was a pretty big deal. It garnered more attention and more traffic at 6 a.m. than the town has ever seen. I watched it from atop the fire ladder on one of the fire department trucks. One-hundred feet in the air with three other people including a guy named Earl who works for a company that covers implosions and blow ups for the Discovery Channel.

If you're thinking how'd he get that job? It was the first thing I asked him.
"I was in the right place at the right time," he said.

Anyway the elephant was brought down in about 10 seconds followed by an ever-expanding pillow of smoke that drifted to the southwest and out of harms way (used to be asbestos inside it and inevitable still some left).

**Was reading on Wired that some film directors are on board with coming up with a program that would allow companies to send movies to theatres via a computer program. It would reduce about 90 per cent of the costs of the current method of shipping film reels to theatres. Audiences wouldn't have to worry about those lines and glitches that pop up occasionally in film reels as a result of digital technology.

Sounds cool and would allow theatres to have more screening options. For example movies that are good could run longer and movies that suck could be shelved sooner.

^^Is cereal a guys thing? Cuz I'm sitting here munching on some Shreddies right from the box. Sometimes when I eat cereal - like if it's Cap'n Crunch or Vector - I could eat a half box at a sitting.

Tell me you favourites and tell me if it's a guy thing. If it is we could start a cereal club.

"How come you kicked me? I was already screaming with pain?"

"I saw my advantage and I took it. It's what superheroes do."

So I had a doozy of a weekend. I did nothing on Saturday. Nothing. Nil. Zip Zilch. Zero.
Serves me right....I had been out for a beer with my boss and another lady from work. Turned in to a rather long night that ended several hours later. I probably would not have been so tired had I first, eaten something and second told Sarah what I was up to.
I got a an early morning phone call from her "reminding" me that letting her know would have made for a better night's sleep for her and - as it turns out - me.
Serves me right.

I could muster only enough jam to watch an episode of American Chopper and a couple of episodes of Sex and the City before I checked out for night.

Today not only was I not a whisper of my normal self I was also productive. I have now a clean apartment not that it ever gets dirty), freshly laundered clothes and linens, an idea of what courses I will be registering for this fall and a nearly completed feature story that, no matter how much time I work on it, will never be as good as I want it to be.

Beauty School Dropout

If you haven't already heard or read about it, TO loves its Miss Universe Natalie Glebova. Thanks to a bylaw the city reneged on its promise to allow her to open up a food festival. That is, unless she does not don her sash and crown at the opening. Read it for yourself and see if you think it's as stupid as I do.

I found a good pop culture blog called popped culture that has some entertaining links (and the Glebova story) you should have a gander at.

When I was making my way home today - it's four and a half minute drive - I listening to CBC. Vancouver council gave its support to a proposal to close two lanes of the Burrard Street Bridge and turn them into bike lanes.
It reminded me of my trip to Van. We had caught a cab to the wedding reception and were at a standstill over six lanes of traffic. Suddenly, a cyclist comes whizzing by us and skips between us and another car with about two inches of clearance on either side of his bike handlebars. I was nervous watching him. I couldn't do it. What if a car inches to the other lane, the cylclist would get projectiled 20 feet down the road and becomes part of the rush hour pile up.
Did you hear about Liberal MLA Lorne Mayencourt not getting charged after he 'agressively pursued' a pandhandler on Vancouver's eastside? Seems there wasn't enough evidence. That's ok though, Mayencourt said that although he would not apologize for his actions, he learned a lesson: let the police do their work. Ok so the panhandler was swearing at people. But one would think Mayencourt would know better than to follow and harass this guy (who may have a mental illness which is the bigger problem). Oh well, he stuck his nose in where it didn't belong and got slugged in the face. Next time you get the urge to chase down a panhandler, keep your left up Lorne.

Didn't make it to Batman tonight. I drove there but the line was too long. Yes, even in Kitimat, they get the odd lineup. Plus I didn't know for sure if I wanted to go to the movies tonight so maybe I was looking for an excuse to go home.

Lesson of the century: Don't try to kill your wife; you'll never get away with it no matter how many tears you shed.

Flyin home(r)

Here's a line you may be familiar with:

"D'oh."

"A dear."

"A female dear."

I got back from Van. I finally got to see Sarah and attend my first very large, very Italian Catholic wedding. There was food aplenty, ample alcohol and a musical melange till the early hours of the morning.

I was around more people in three days then I was for the past three months in Kitimat. It was as though I was in a sort of social prison and I had been given a weekend pass. I said sort of...anything but a prison environment up here, it's just bustles so, like a kaleidoscope of activity, bubbling and fizzing like a freshly-poured carbonated drink.
Alright. Enough with the metaphors. I had a great time and got to take in a completely different lifestyle for three days.

On a side note, I am working my way through (with pleasure) the fifth and sixth season of Sex and the City. I didn't have the chance to watch them before school ended and I have, so far, found it to be the perfect cure for the mid-summer blahs in this chapter of 'Life in a Northern Town.'

I heard what I thought was a funny quote on a TV show last night.

A: "I don't want to be vice-president."

B: "You have to do this. You're nice to people. You're polite. You say excuse me. You look like birds dress you in the morning."

Laying down the paper is going much better this time. My head isn't smarting from banging it on the desk, I'm not frantic about not getting it done and I feel--invigorated, almost like the first smell of spring when it teases your nose and your mind wanders back to the magical whimsical days growing up when you didn't have a care in the world and you rode bikes, wind blowing in your face, hair blowing in you face as you shake your head to clear it from your eyes as you couldn't ride down to the store quick enough to buy chips, chocolate bars and pop that you wanted to eat and then your mom would get mad at you for spoiling your dinner appetite and the memory of that voice rings in your ear like a nagging little cramp in your stomach that you would get after going outside to play too soon after eating but you didn't care and sometimes you would ignore them and carry on like a warrior because all you wanted to do was have the spontaneous type of fun, like going to the fair every year and wandering around as the heat from the pavement would hit your face like a wave of fire and you were sweating which made you think of the swimming pool at your friend's house but he wasn't with you because you had a fight earlier that week because he stole your ribbons from play day at school after you got more than him and he was trying to be better than you at everything and you just smiled as though you didn't care because your parents told you to ignore it but you didn't think they understood what it was like because you know everything when you're a kid and the world revolves around you like the kind of spinning top that you had to wind string around but the string kept breaking like it did on those old school yo-yos that came out in like the 40s or something when there was no TV and people used to gather around the radio to listen to radio programs like War of the Worlds when about 3 million people actually believed that earth was being invaded and they left their homes like a little kid running away from home and then came back after they found out it was just a show and they felt silly that like got sucked in and the newspapers printed the story about what happened kind of like we would today except they would be using different methods then I'm using today to lay out the paper today which is going very well compared to the last time I did it....

Gotta go. The paper awaits me.

Words (what are words for)?

I was talking to my daughter today. She's nine and like many her age, she's crazy about Hilary Duff. Our conversations cover various topics relating to pop culture. Today it was the Backstreet Boys (in rank of who is best looking. She ranked, I listened) and 'friends' who talk behind your back. She's had it happen and claims it doesn't bother her. I hope not. But I know how words can cut you emotionally and leave lifetime scars.....Takes me back to Grade 5. To digress, this incident came about after watching School of Rock. The kids in the movie all play their own instruments--and they are all very talented. (Take that Partridge Family). I think playing an instrument is an amazing thing. I felt like knocking on doors in my building to try and find someone who was willing to sell me their guitar.Anyway, Grade 5. In what was a scientific way to decide if people had any musical ability, we took half of the 5th grade and put them in a room with a tape recorder. Different sounds were played in three categories: one was like, rhythmn, one was sounds and I can't remember the third. You had to answer from a series of multiple choice questions and, based on a score ranging from 1 to10 (1=best, 10=worst) you were recommended to try out for band if you so chose. My scores were 10, 1 and 4. Cut it in half and in there pretty solid. I had trouble hearing the first category sounds and I think that affected my score. Excuse? Maybe....So I didn't fit the criteria for band. I got over it. But I didn't get over the teacher Mrs. Sheardown - yes, that was her name - and what she said to me. She looked at my score, then at me and 'Scott, you don't...' and she stopped short of whatever she was going to say. She just shook her head as if to say you don't have what it takes. And even though I was interested in band, I listened to her.I guess I write this for two reasons: one, what you say can impact someone else for a long time; two, i shouldn't have listened to her. I should have figured out for myself if I was cut out for the band.

Oh Canada

Yes I was one of the 2 billion that watched LIve 8. And I enjoyed it. For those of you who were too cool to watch (if you were too busy i understand) you missed what I called a smorgasboard of entertainment; it had something for every taste.
I gotta say right off that Motley Crue rocked the crowd in Barrie with energy-injected good ol' rock and roll. Although some of my j-school compatriots hadn't cracked the double-digit age mark, opening with Kickstart My Heart brought the people to life. You can dislike the music but you cannot deny they enrgized the crowd.
There were some unusual pairings of note: Sarah McLaughlan w/Josh Groban and Adam Levine of Maroon 5 and Stevie Wonder. I knew Groban could sing but Levine impressed me. The guy got soul. Speaking of soul, Joss Stone (in her traditional barefoot attire) worked the stage and the crowd and was as soulful, sultry and seductive as ever. She's got the voice and she knows how to deliver.
One of my favourites was Madonna. The stage was awash in white as Madonna opened with Like a Prayer. I couldn't help but think back to when the video was released the protest from the Catholic Church. With Madonna was a beautiful African lady whose life was saved after the first LIve Aid 20 years ago--for those who think you cannot make a difference. Of course in true Madonna fashion, she managed to blurt out the 'F-word' right as the church choir accompanying her was filing off the stage. I kept thinking, she may be a mom of two, she may author children's books and she may be 'mellowing out some' but she was amazing.
Of all the bands I saw, only one seemed a little uncomfortable and that was A-ha. Lead singer couldn't hit the high notes like back in the day.
I was taken aback by the performances of Deep Purple and DMC (yes Manny DMC=rapper)

I watched School of Rock this a.m. and something Jack Black's character says in the movie fit with the theme of Live 8 perfectly: 'One performance can change the world.' I'll admit I'm doubtful that one performance can eradicate worldwide hunger but I think that is the easier way out is to take the apathetic stance that events like these are a source of enjoyment more than raising awareness. I've heard that Geldhoff is abrasive and has no business pressuring the leaders of the G-8 countries to make debt cancellation a first priority. Perhaps my logic may be faulty here but NASA has spent billions (or trillions) on space travel. We all spend billions on things for our own pleasure and entertainment. Arguments that there are better ways for governments and the general public to spend money are always hovering near the surface.
Yes people like to get together and have fun and many were doing just that. But I like to think that some were actually touched by the events of the day and that at some level - whether that be child sponsorship or missions trips to build homes or bring medication to the people - some people will be inspired or compelled to do their part to make a difference.
And in the time its taken me to write this entry, I'm estimating that about 400 hundred Africans have died of starvation. And yet, my life goes on with a full stomach I might add.